*Wipes dust off face* Im sooooo sorry I've been away, life just went on like a roller coaster, graduated, went to camp and now im serving somewhere above the confluence state :-). But I'm serving now, and I've got access to superfast internet 24/7....ermmm, sorry 10/6 :-) and I have loads to rant and muse about.
Was at a church program some Sundays back and, my Pastor asked a very stunning question and I’m going to ask you too.
Do you know how many people will cheat on their partners if they knew they’ll never be caught?
You might not be sure of the stats, but you just might, right? And more shocking is the awfully painful truth I realized after the service. Men, especially in this part of the Niger, cheat simply because they can!
Let me explain,
Mr G is a 5’6 typical Nigerian man, married to the Mrs and they have 3 children to show for the 9 years of marriage, all boys btw. So it happens that Mr G is bored with his wife and wants a lil sumfin sumfin by the side, a lil more curve, a lil more whatever you guys call it, but note, Mr G has a very healthy and well rounded ‘one pack’ and since he’s an average Nigerian man who is expected to be a regular 'eba swallower', its allowed to have a pot belly.
Now to the Mrs, with grateful hearts to the big J, she has kids by him, and none look like the neighbor neither are they all gurls, buh JUST BECAUSE she has gained ‘some’ over the years and….maybe she has a few bicycle tires on her waist, then he gets tired and blames the quenching love life on her……..what about him, is it cos she’s tryna be a Prov 31 woman that he doesn’t know that she also wants an Idris Elba or a Chris Attoh, camaaan, cut her plenty slack, child bearing is no joke, I always hear guys talk about how we women let ourselves go, well, men let go too, *rolling my head*. And so he gets a younger gurl who’s still got some curves and then the Mrs hears and when she complains to her own mother, she has this to say
“Take it easy my dear, men are all the same, you have to bear with him, all men cheat, he’ll grow out of it, even your father had 1, it’s what makes us the wives, you have to be mature about it”
My 1st reaction is @#$%^*!@ ARE YOU KIDDING, but then again, this is real talk, real life and then Oga himself is not even ashamed, feels it’s his right and expects her to understand, even the society doesn’t frown on it as much as it frowns when the Mrs is the one ‘eating out’, camaann, its not fair, I don’t believe all men are the same, and why can’t he be the mature one, how old does he have to grow till he matures, some of these men are grandpas, I mean Wikipedia says the ratio of men to women in Nigeria is 1.04, which means there are more males than females, isn’t he even happy he got one, I mean…whats happening is not fair, but I don’t even know who to point at, the women are suffering alright, but they are also the contributors and the men being men are just riding on the wings of our own handmade theory.
Its still sounds insane, but there are still women out there with this school of thought, ‘I know you are cheating, but please be smart about it’, O honey *in Marshall Ericsson’s voice*, even if he’s smart about not getting caught, what about the STDs, what about all the money he’s spending on her, yes, what about it mehn. I used to be part of those women who say, if you cheat, pls be smart about it, but then I realized, it’s a silly thing to think, not all men are the same!
Men, over the years, knowingly or unknowingly built the notion that a woman should basically know how to cook clean, and generally run a home, just by expecting it! We can do the same, cheating isn’t natural, its not ‘a mans thing’ and pls don’t gimme that crap about different pots of soup, I have bitterleaf, efo and edikaikong soup in the freezer, tell me when you are hungry.
Yours……..ever loving :)