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Wednesday, 15 June 2011

Excuse me miss..........

Funny story: true life oh, happened to me
Was walking back home as ma house is just a bus stop away, after a whie, I realized someone has been walking bhind me, a guy precisely, so I quickened ma step but he was still on ma trail, so I increased ma pace again but this time he walks up to me with a very tired n cute smile and says, “ im sory if u r scared, but I think we r actually headed d same way but u r walking quite fast n I cant overtake ur pace.” And then we both smile and continue our walk (u’ll get the joke, if u really know how fast I walk)……..dont ask me what happened next, lool.
While It happened it really wasn’t funny as someone from ma workplace had almost been kidnapped, sorry adultnapped n I didn’t want such experience, but looking at it now…………this was a nice pickup line……..or tactics, except that if he hadn’t walked up to me at the time he did, God knows, I would have run, loool yesss oh, I was really going to run for dear life.
Sounds funny and even weird, but funnier is the wack pickup lines guys use these days, from the very archaic, ‘u must b an angel’, to the cute but weird-if-not-said-right, ‘that must hurt……..the fall from heaven’, I mean kudos to the guys sha, forming these lines is not beans oh, but haba, I think u people should test run ur newer versions………….but not on girls sha. I cant even remember any wack one cos they are just too funny n stupid sumtyms…….no wait I remember one case, kai, I know how much courage it takes a guy to walk up to a gurl n all n how gurls shouldn’t be so rude n all, but…..chai, what is ‘can I know you’ meant to be!

DO NOT EVER EVER EVER, I wish I could emphasis this enough, do not ask for her name or digits (as it she’s an amphibian), or her house addy, don’t do it! Engage her in an interesting conversation, if your game is that tight, damn, she’ll even give you her sleeping posture!

The idea is to chat her up, ‘chat’, not profile her up, haba, na interview!!  I even remember this guy who was so pathetic as he was actually begging for my name………wait, what makes you guys think the name I’ll give is even my real name, I mean I’ve answered all sort, from Favour to Ann to Anastasia to Samantha to Eunice to Helen. All these names are not even my favorite names but are actually a trick to expose their  true speech pattern as most of them come with this irritating Ghanaian-British- Pidgin English and by the time you pronounce ‘fair-vor’ or ‘hey-lin’, you would have exposed yourself  XD
Sha all im trying to say to the fellas is, be innovative, first impression matters u know!
Life’s Good.

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