Becoming Mrs…….

Yes, in a couple of days, I’ll be Mrs somebody, and the planning has been #@$%#$%. Jeeeeeeezzz, there’re so many things needed to be done nowadays, you have to;

• have a bridal shower, 
• have asoebi, 
• create hashtag, 
• do pre-wedding shoot, 
• task your bridesmaids and collect ya moni, 
• have committee of friends and task them too, 
• buy wedding gown, 
• rent hall (with prices looking like house rent) and 
• ontop of everything, you still have to arrange for transportation and accommodation for your guests. For heaven’s sake, I don’t think the couple of the wedding at Cana, in the Bible, organized bus for Jesus and his mama, they found their way na.

Everyone sees an intending couple as an avenue to make quick money, the annoying part is that phrase, ‘it’s a once in a lifetime event oh, so do it well’. Of course I want to do it well, but then do I really need bridal shower, do I need pre-wedding video, do I need to take lessons to do dramatic entrance biko, whatever happened to dancing in joyouslywith your hubby. I don’t think my mum had bridal shower and she and my dad are still loving up like teenagers. The pressure in this wedding business is out of this world, chineke! First, they pressure you to marry, ok, ekenedilichikwu, you find man to marry, then they pressure you on things to do for the wedding, and Bella and all those annoying blogs aren’t even helping matters.


Why can’t we just elope and go to a church and be blessed and continue life…………ok I think I’m just venting, I can never elope, not if I’m still my mother’s daughter, because she will pray my plans to scatter and pray me back home! Sounds like jazz, but trust me, its pure and unadulterated prayer. My mum is one of those people that can pray NEPA to bring back the light and, Voila! Yope, I have one of those literal prayer warrior mothers.


Ok, maybe I’m just angry at how much weddings cost these days, no wonder men want to be millionaires before they even start thinking marriage. Everything costs money, even in church, you pay, and the nonsense dollar, abi oil, has affected everything, even tin tomatoes is not as red as it used to be sef, jollof rice in parties these days are looking more and more confused. I’ve come to realize, that those marrying in this economy really love each other. In fact, I won’t be surprised if there are men pegging their marriage to a $100/barrel economy and to those ones I say, wehdone sirs!


Inshort, I’m tired, we’ll share the food and collect gifts right after church, we’ll save the house rent, sorry, hall rent money and payment for DJ and MC and, YESSS save the souvenir sharing episode, y’all don’t need souvenirs to know we are married, the child naming in 9 months should clear all doubts.


Yours…………in transition (like metamorphosis into a wife, not obituary biko)



A.D

Box Heels!!!

I had that feeling yesterday…….that weird feeling of…..fear, like fear of the unknown, hoping for the best but also preparing for the worst

.

Let me explain, I was expecting shoes………..shoes that I asked my mum to get for me, I asked her to buy them for me because the price of things here are ridiculously silly, common yoghurt that is 70 naira in the F.C.T is a whooping 120.

So I asked her to get one for me from home and as loving and wonderful as she always is, she bought 3. But now I’m here scared for myself and that’s because my mum’s fashion sense is still a little stuck in the 80’s, (she believes Caribbean skirts and corporate shirts are a perfect combo and doesn’t believe ‘Fela trousers’ are out of fashion) but don’t get me wrong she’s well advanced in other fashion aspects, in fact in bags, she’s got it, she even got me my first Caribbean skirt and believe me, I can still rock that skirt today, but then again…… So now you see my fear, I really hope she doesn’t go alone to shop for them, but I also hope she doesn’t go with someone like her ………hmmm, just relax I told myself, mummy knows best.

An hour later my cousins return and hand me a nylon of…………..towel, mscewww, I dropped it and searched till I found them, I held the nylon in my hands for like 2minutes before I opened them………..

Oh My God, this is one is beautiful…….and this one too, wow who knew she’ll get me really lovely heels…………..and then I picked the last one, my fears were staring at me in the face, nooooooo, it looked like a guys shoe, all elongated and square shaped infront, and had box heels! I was literally weak……….

But it’s alright, I have two lovely shoes to compensate right, and now I had to call and say thank you and also wear them to work tomorrow……….

This reminded me of my very young days, when mummy solely did the shopping, shoes, clothes, hats (especially those Sunday dresses that had shoes and bags made out of the same fabric with the dress) and as ‘good naija gurls’ we had to wear them with great gratitude and pride, little wonder we all turned out very confident girls, able to wear with pride whatever we had.

Coming to the now, even my little cousins will not wear anything that doesn’t have Hannah Montana or High School Musical or any Disney princess on it, they’ll cry and fall and roll on the floor, in my days, who dash you liver, ehhenn, don’t collect the dress, you’ll pay with your next two Christmas dresses.

Watching them display, it just makes me cherish all the more all the training I had, even the ones that seemed mean and selfish. Thank you mum, for you teaching me that if you can’t find the bright side of life, polish the dull side.

Yours……….thankful and content

A.D