Like I told a friend of mine, if only ladies knew thet true role of wives, that they are the foundation of a home, they pray more tham priests and sleep less than guards. If only someone told them, maybe we would reduce the statistics of broken homes, especially among Christians (of which that word has lost its potency, thats gist for another day). Wives grow to become mothers, who raise children who are meant to be properly raised to avoid this generation of men with committment phobia and truck load of baggage.
Im not married.....yet, but as a good observer and from experience, I think Ive leant a few things i'll love to share with y'all.
There are quite a few but the one I'ld love to share this important one. Ladies, NOT ALL SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS SHOULD LEAD TO MARRIAGE I write in upper case for very serious emphasis. Lot of times, you realise that the seriousness of the said relationship is all your (the lady) effort. I've come to realize that when a lady demands committment and succeeds in getting it, its rarely stable, but when its the lad who shows the committment and who is the serious one, its lasts (because, the woman's committment is almost sure when she sees that her man is serious).
A wise man once told me, even in the Bible, what God requested from the womenfolk in marriage is respect for the man not love. Please dont get me wrong, love is the bedrock of the relationship but for marriage, its respect for the man not just love. When the man loves you, its vital. Thats why God himself requests love from the man cos He knows mans make-up. A friend once told me, babe, 'a woman shouldn't marry the man she loves the most, but should marry the man who loves her most'
Women love easily, its our genetic make up, thats even why sometimes we see ladies fall in love with the guy who raped them! Weird but true.
I know sometimes its difficult not to imagine marriage with the level of seriousness, I mean, you might even have his mum on bbm, you might even have his engagement ring, but in the mist of all these, we shouldnt loose sight of the red lights and negative signs, dating or courtship period is the only time we have the power over a relationship, once you say 'I do', omo steering don change hand o.
That you guys are serious doesnt mean, y'all are altar bound. Some relationships are just there to groom you for the real deal. Sometimes, the girl endures all the crap the guy displays so she can endure the bullshit in marriage with her real guy. Sometimes the guy learn to tolerate all the nonsense the lass dishes so he can truly tolerate his real wifey's real mess up.
That you've been together for 5, 6 or even 8 years doesnt mean, he must marry you, come to think of it, the rest of your life is quite a long time compared to 8 years.
Not all serious relationship should lead to the altar. Better a broken relationship than a broken marriage. My two shillings.
Shine ya eye ladies.